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Take it from someone whose new “friend” ran up the bar tab while keeping her purse hidden all night: Start with coffee. The sad fact is that some people are just looking for an excuse to go out with especially a naïve chump who will pick up the bill. Case in point: After connecting online and hitting it off over an extended phone conversation, I met a woman for a happy-hour drink.She was an attractive redhead with a sparkling personality and a great smile.Don’t claim to be a gourmet cook when you can barely boil water.Don’t portray yourself as someone you’re not, because sooner or later your date will get a peek behind the curtain. If the good vibes are mutual, you’ll be scheduling another get together soon, anyway. Many among us have a hardwired set of beliefs regarding how we appear to the outside world and what our ideal mate should look like, and we are disinclined to stray from our preconceived notions.

Most wanted to push past the introductory emails and calls to schedule a get-together ASAP.Men are often accused of focusing exclusively on the physical, but I soon realized there are plenty of women who do the same.

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